November 1

Last night, my ex-husband came trick-or-treating with us (it was "my" night, but he's always encouraged to come to this stuff). During the course of the evening, I mentioned that they might have some trouble getting to sleep what with all the sugar coursing through their systems. He said "No, they had me up at 4am." Me: [ha] "Why? Were there kidneys to be kicked?" Him: "No, the plumbing is mortally clogged and the siding is all torn off the side of the house to provide access to the pipe." So, since we were all in his car (New Wife was not present) I asked "Have you tried the new electronic cigarettes?" As he was answering, the 7yo piped up. "Daddy, do you SMOKE?" His response was "No, just cigars," which seemed sorta like bullshit given that my foot was touching a pack of Pall Malls, which I really wanted to bounce off his head.

I guess fate's wedding gift to them was overflowing pipes of sewage. It seems appropriate.